Noticing My Ego

This morning while meditating I caught myself in a common thought pattern. I felt a shift in my body's energy and I noticed the mind-frame and the breathing that had brought it about. I thought to myself: "Remember this. Remember what you were thinking and how you were breathing. You can teach this to others."

Then I realized that this was my ego trying to turn self-awareness into something that can be harnessed and explained. It was my ego trying to turn an experience of humility and connection into a quality of superiority.

After noticing this, I remember how often during my practices I have this thought. "Remember this later so you can show somebody (how much you know)." All those times, it was my ego trying to control my practice and progress. My ego wants so much to be admired and respected.

I will try to let this go. To have realizations without holding on to them. To make progress without taking note of how much progress I've made.